Friday, 27 February 2009

Welcome aboard, UK Press! We have a Revolution to do Together

Post number 196

Hammurabi definitely applies. Sentences may not make sense. No time to edit. The dam has filled up. I am managing the ‘spillway’ to avoid dam bursting open and flood downstream.

Welcome aboard UK press. You are not mad, deviant or any thing. It was this psychiatry thing that had shut up every body, and I have sorted them out for you all.

But first, an assurance that this revolution cannot, will not and shall not fail. That is a guarantee. It’s been on paper. I am simply playing it out and giving it to all piece by piece. Provided I remain disciplined, it cannot fail. I will remain disciplined. Here is how it works.


‘Truth’ and TRUTH can only be used as ultimate unbeatable force on earth provided I do NOT mix my personal side with the blog side, if you will.

Here is the first request to Muslims: To the Friday gathering ‘Juma’ at Royal Holloway University of London, Egham. Please continue to respect my privacy. I have not spoken a word to any of you or Katie Kerr of the Student Union (if still there). I have not even met Katie.

If I ever as much as saying to any one that it was I who did all that stuff, then ‘truth’ is dead. So is TRUTH, and through it, metaphorically, Arch Bishop Desmond Tutu, Nelson Mandela and others. Finished. The whole thing collapses. The blog collapses. There will be no more writings and this living book will come to an end.

There is another way to look at it: If you think, I am going to meet Mandela, Barack or even you lot (the press), then you must be joking. What am I going to say? How are you going to start? Will you try to make me bigger than I am? You can’t. It’s impossible. I have not happened in the history of human kind. There may be a long, long time before another one comes along.

In fact, there will be no need for another one to come along. Because, if I live, I will finish it off. From here to Djibouti, Papua New Guinea, East Timour, the Balkans, Afghanistan (last. Afghan code. We feed our guest first even before our own children, or I will have ripped Hamid Karzai apart by now!).

I am no religious freak, the promised one, or any one else. I am as human as all of you and use colourful language (deliberately) to distract the misguided ones who may very well make me in to some body.

So, relax. I came, I did and I died. That’s it. No more.

To CCCC Limited stake holders and Jagjeet Singh Sandhu, company secretary, and brother: Of course, I have not forgotten about dry cleaning and the £15,000 Ahmadzai family commitment money. Just keep on looking at reading the blog title: It will always say ‘Sea Change In Dry Cleaning’. How else, and why should I convince you otherwise? You have the proof. It’s just a question of when.

Now, let’s get down to business, UK press.

Thank you Martin Bell, the Martial Law PCC Commissioner who replaced Sir Christopher Mayer long ago.

Before I forget, It’s not my fault that so many Jews got in to H.M. Martial Law Cabinet. It just happened that they are so damn good at what they do. From Lord Winston, to David Milliband and Edwina. I need real professionals with sharp abilities to get things done.

So, first. Edwina, get cracking and bring Emma Soames (Churchill’s grand daughter in to play. She likes to get her hands dirty at the newspaper press and do stuff. This is the time to do it girl.

Then get Louri Turner, Emma’s colleague at the Evening Standard and fashion.

Then get Hillary Alexander (Fashion, Daily Telegraph) and Anna Wintour (Vogue, New York, Tom Ford (still with Yves St Laurent?).

This is getting out of hand, UK press. The head is full of stuff and just pours out. Catalogue yourselves.

Psychiatry: They are thoroughly fed up to their eye balls about the way they have been TOLD to psychiatrise. How come is it that when you go and see one, it is them who don’t make sense, not you! Ask Lenny Henry, Stephen Fry, and Paul Merton. Psychiatrists have been instructed for decades to get hold of UK talent and kill them off, so that we will never be able to compete with Hollywood, Harvard, Proctor & Gamble and the rest. Well, they can all fuck off now, for I have set psychiatry itself free.

Through it, UK press, you are free.

Kids: Should we ever worry about them any more? Never! They will do it themselves. There will be no time to hang around parks, drink cheap vodka and take drugs. There will be no time for any of that. They will become the press’ right hand folks, and become new photo journalists. They have also been set free of psychiatry.

Kids, go way back in the blog, and look up Rare Breed Sheep of the UK. Become members of clubs.

I have set free HRH, The Prince of Wales and his Mutton Club Renaissance. Join in. Get proactive. Never mind what the Royals are or are not supposed to do. Just do it.

Sir whoever of RBS. Dig in press. Take him apart. £650,000 pension indeed.

I run the world with H.M Pension credit of £124.50 a week. How much am I worth?

World countries: Aren’t you just a shade over governed if I can run all of your countries for about a fiver a day?

These are some of the curiosities that indicate just how much things will change.

The new word is to Consumerise. This phrase will remove shyness in the establishment about the uses of Privatise, Nationalise and the rest. We are entering a new economic era where 60 million people will decide. I have given one day old infants an equal purchasing power of 1, the same as adults. Their needs may be just a few nappies, a baby grow, and milk powder.

Infants may be given proportional representation. Who knows?

The important thing is that for any project, you need data, feasibility studies, thesis, blue prints, and final working documents.

Any thing the Window Dresser government does is fitting a round peg in to a square hole. They want to maintain capitalism as it was, while clearly, the public’s money is used unauthorised, to maintain status quo (could have put better. You do it).

The public of 60 million have the data out there. Until 5, 10, 20 millions (UK police, no fear. You will be a part of it. Just join in) come out and give us the data through the NEW PRESS (YOU), magazines, TV, theatre, cinema (Ealing, Pinewood, et al), Glastonbury, etc.

Welcome, Italian fashion. I heard you. Make up our dry cleaning model for your own demos, and do it. When marching on Mafia houses and palaces, they can’t shoot the sea of people approaching their castles. Just go in, take those AK 47s. Shove them where the sun doesn’t shine. Start with the butt (thick) end first, so that the process is painful when the gun is driven in, and then out by their street assistant.

Paolo Ferrando (Imperial College alumni), Italian Catholic married to Candy, the New York Jew. This Muslim was your best man in Chelsea Registrar’s Office. Hi there. Join us. You will know that the Zenga family work very hard to keep Australian Merino wool alive. They buy it, make suits out of it and sell it for 6,000 Euro a go.

UK press: Pick up the thread from the International Year of Natural Fibres, thank them for the e-mail they sent me yesterday, expressing solidarity. Find IWTO, Scottish Enterprise and partners (Modiano, Johnstons, et al) and work on representing wool fairer.

Leave China alone about burying the world’s wool in cavity walls. China will know that I will need at least 100,000 new dry cleaning machines to begin with, new chemicals to mix and the rest.

Thank Arnie and tell him I won’t be back now! He will set Dr Bob and his 3,500 dry cleaners free.

Join in with the Spanish and expose drug ring of Argentina, Spain, and France through football.

I thank Worcester for twinning with Gaza. Wow! Run with it, press.

I thank Southampton for crying out loud about having been dumb down with fluoridation. Hit it. Expand it. Run with it. Bring Ireland in. Do your stuff.
No psychiatry, remember? They are one of us now. Nurses bored still for not using the knowlwdge they’ve learnt.

Jo Brand: Heard you loud and clear honey. Shame we will never meet, but still, love your nine letter words on COUNT DOWN, Channel 4 British TV, world. Good stuff. Keep on watching it.

Dig in to Bangladesh. What does Sheikh Hassina (daughter of founder, Sheikh Mujeeb Ur Raman) want. Boarder stuff. Unification with India? Is that what the mutineers wanted?

Open up Sri Lanka. Why divide a small country to two? Smells of Bosnification.

Why were the Norwegians, the best peace makers removed from peace making in Sri Lanka and Middle East. Step back in, Norway.

How has this been for starters, press.

Go for it.

I have done Consumerism here.

I will do Guantanamo soon.

The public keep bugging me as to what do I mean by ‘no stone unturned’. Well, the general answer is that the blog will ask any question the world is unable to ask!!!. I have no fear of any one. I don’t exist, remember.

In particular, I will give the public a taste: Michael Barrymore! I will dig in as deep as need be. That is a promise

Oh, help out Defence Secretary Robert Gate about the American coffins arriving home from theatres in Afghanistan and Iraq. If my Americans want their lost ones accurately recorded, better televised or not, I will know. We will do it.

Mohammad Ahmadzai,
Team Leader, Earth Projects

PS What does Senior President Phillippe Calderon of Mexixo saying? He says he is in control of Mexican soil, the whole of it. Then how come 40,000 troops and a strong boarder police force couldn't stop the Drug Lords dealing directly to US GOERNMENTS (!!!) boader gaurds. Bust Mexico open, UK press.

Is Burma = Columbia and partially = Afghanistan? Airports in Herat, near THE IRANIAN BOARDER (!!!) (both military and civilain) close at 18:00 Afghan time until 06:00 hours and are soleley used by US military transprtes planes. Locals say, among other stuff, the Afghan opium is loaded and taken to secret American citiy (ies) in Geramny for distribution to Europe.

Open up Holland. Now, there some people. Stromg culture, excellent family unity, lesser teenage pregnacies, and they smoke dope openly. How do they do it? I know how. Do you? You see, the Dutch are no nossensical people. Take them as they are. If you don't like them, that's tough lough. If they don't like you, that's even tougher.

Tell Daniel Barenboim its not time for one of his concerts yet to remember Edward Saeed. I keep preparing the ground, Hillary keeps on ruinning it.


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